Unhinged?

Today's post is not one of my typical posts.  Today's post is about having an "off day".  Oh, and I am off today.  I want a break.  Afterall, I am human and my plate overfloweth with many, many things.  It started last night:  I completed my graduate school assignment I have been working on and submitted it!  Yeah!  It was done and submitted!  Accomplishment and feeling good, right?  You betcha!  I read the requirements for my next assignment due mid December.  Well, if I were a very astute graduate student, I would have reviewed it earlier to find out I needed to collaborate with a school teacher for it.  (Insert slight panic here).  I will be fine.  It will all work out, besides all I can do now is be proactive and STAY CALM. 

Yes, I know all the breathing techniques and to stay calm.  And I will stay calm and I actually look calm.  On the inside however, I am a complete anxiety ridden mess, you betcha!  (The tall cup of coffee I had a couple hours ago doesn't help either.) 

This is another side of me I don't seem to portray in my blog, at least, not in my opinion.  So, here's another confession.... I became scared and wanted to retreat out of the situation which was never a good thing when I was my "former" self.  I am not her and I will keep moving forward!  I told myself my new mantra or saying when I become scared or I was faced with an obstacle is to "Keep Moving Forward" even though, I want to run in the exact opposite direction, hide my head, bury it and make it go away.  NOT HAPPENING!  Not a chance.  And once I get this all out of my head, I will be able to carry on and move forward.  Sometimes, I just need to get it out and be done with it.  Here I am in all my glory, somewhat unhinged, yet knowing it will all work out as it is meant to be. 

I will stay the course and persevere as we all face our fears and anxieties.  Today is one of those days for me.  I will finish this rant and treat myself to some relaxation time, or so I say.  Knowing me, I'll work on something else for one of my other classes! 

Until then, I remain insanely sane, As ever it is!


Peace and Joy to you!